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Hasselhoff's Overpriced "Fortress of Hoffitude": Just $3.5 M
Filed Under: News
Internationally-known television actor David Hasselhoff just placed his home - dubbed the "Fortress of Hoffitude" - on the market. His five bedroom, six bath, Encino, California home is on the market for $3.5 million red Speedos, err, dollars.
For a man flashy enough to sport a sequined jacket, his home, the "Fortress of Hoffitude," sure does disappoint. Did he trade his surf board for the entire catalog of Crate and Barrel? Take a look...
Sure, when you stage your home for sale the general recommendation is beige and boring. But Hasselhoff? He's taken predictable interiors to heart. Perhaps we should remember he hosted "America's Got Talent,", not "America's Got Taste."
For example:
A completely beige kitchen. He probably never eats whole grains or oats. How could he, if he can't see them against this beige room?

A palm-tree-frond fan in his dining room? No international actor -- certainly no one with a house at this price point --should have fixtures available to the unfilmed masses. That's a rule.

Finally, what's up with this boring, beige media room? The only unique detail seems to be the fur-covered footstool.

One thing the "Fortress of Hoffitude" does have going for it? Lush, and lovely, exteriors. Thumbs up there. Take a virtual tour of the entire estate here -- but be warned, turn off your speakers. The sappy music will make you wish you were a drowning character on "Baywatch" -- just to end the misery.

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WHAT IS WRONG WITH THIS HOUSE. IT IS BEAUTIFUL AND ANYONE IN THEIR RIGHT MIND WOULD LOVE TO HAVE IT. THE PERSON WHO WROTE THIS ARTICLE SHOULD HAVE THEIR HEAD EXAMINED TO EVEN HAVE THE EMPTYHEADED AUDACITY TO CRITICIZE SUCH A LUXURIOUS HOME. IF THE AUTHOR CRITICIZES THIS HE WILL CRITICIZE ANYTHING THAT IS BEAUTIFUL IN THIS WORLD. GET A LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!